Day 2 - 2nd November 2009

Was rushing back to the hospital this am and not sure of what would greet me... the feeling of the unknown and being so out of control is overwhelming...I dont know what will greet me in the little room they have put her in, in Neonatal ICU...Right in the corner with not much light or space...I walked in after washing my hands to hear my daughter crying....why is she suffering so? What is the lesson to be learn't by watching a 7 year old suffering like this? Her head must be so sore... she has swelling on the brain and the brain stem...she has suffered a severe stroke and we dont know if she will ever be normal again...she stopped breathing yesterday as well....how much more must she take?.... I have just found out she suffered severe seizures which is part of this injury and is now on Epilum as well. How much more? She has machines everywhere and is being pricked like a pin cushion and there is nothing I can do to stop this...we have put the radio on in the room as Kezzie loves music and always sang along in the car to all the songs played on 5FM. This little girl of mine has such a fighting spirit even when sedated yesterday she came back fighting... she is fighting all the way... She makes me so damn proud to be her mom...